Correct Communication

 

Many of the problems that cause relationships to crumble (i.e. cause your pot of Love Stew to boil over) find their genesis in a lack of communication. In mentioning communication, I do not mean the conventional

 

“Let me tell you about my day at work today: I need to vent”.

 

This type of communication is fine and dandy if your lover does not mine being a vent sponge for an hour or two. Let the reader understand, at the end of the day, this form of communication caters only to you and your wants, i.e. your need to vent. Although this sort of communication may be healthy for you, this does not mean it is always healthy for your relationship.

The type of communication that is needed in a relationship is the communication of knowing how one another think about things, especially in the sphere of love and relationships.

Many women who has been with their lover for a long period of time feel they do not need to communicate with him about heavy issues. They feel they already know how he thinks on issues. Well, let me be the first to inform those of this mindset: you do not know how your man thinks if you are not communicating with him on a frequency higher than venting. Men and people in general are evolving continually. This is what we do as humans. Many of the things people thought about and believed one year ago, they think totally different about now. This is why people get saved, change faiths, or even leave their faith alone. They change their thinking. They change their minds.

If you have a lover whom you feel you know the ends and outs too, but have not been communicating with him on a higher level of frequency than venting, my advice to you is to get with the program. Otherwise, your lover may be looking at the front door. And you may not have a clue of this until he is walking through it.

You women who have not been with your lover very long, and you women who are about to embark on a new relationship, I advise you to learn your lover. Learn him well through constructive communication. Find out what he thinks on important issues, especially those of love. If you find your view of love is radically different from his, see if there is any common ground you two can meet on. This Love Stew you create for one another, you will want it to be the only stew he eats from. Thus, communicate! And as mentioned earlier, find out the special seasonings he enjoy, (i.e. those seasonings that really send sensations to his taste-buds.)

Also let him know about what you think, especially on topics associated with love and relationship. If the woman I mentioned above had never sat down and discussed the seasoning she enjoys in her Love Stew (i.e. sharing gifts,) she would have eventually let him know through bickering and arguing, which would have led down one of two roads:

 

• The road of breakup where the two go their separate ways harboring regrets of ever coming together.

 

• The road of an inferiority complex where the man complies with her bickering needs, receiving her seasoning instructions through the conduit of arguments and demands, which results in the man feeling he is complying with a dictatorship. This second road could lead to an assortment of places you never want to take a person in a relationship.

 

Real communication, especially dealing with the topic of love is a major key to unlocking happiness in a love relationship. Being on the same page of how love is defined will save you from a lot of misunderstandings and unnecessary arguing.